Ask the Master of the Extraordinary – Computer Nerd

I was busy coding the other day when I received a strange email from one of our readers:

Dear Tales of Extraordinary Sanity,

I am your biggest fan! I have read every single article that you have ever written and think that you guys are comic geniuses! I don’t know how you guys do it but keep up the good work!

Anyways, since you all seem so smart, I was wondering if you could help me out with a small problem that I have been having lately. You see, my girlfriend has been complaining a lot about the amount of time that I spend on the computer. Apparently, I don’t pay enough attention to her or some bullshit like that. I don’t know what the big deal is. What’s wrong with coming home from a long day at work and screwing around, visiting sites like yours? I need to unwind! Why can’t she understand that??

Thanks for the help!

Sincerely,

A Big Computer Nerd

Do I look like an advice columnist to you!?! I sure as hell don’t remember asking our readers to “please tell us your problems at talesofextraordinarysanity@gmail.com and we will help you out in a jiffy!” I don’t have time for this shit. You think this site is going to just run itself? *&$%#@*#%@……..

….Alright, Simone and Carlos have convinced me to respond, just this once, so here goes:

Dear Big Computer Nerd,

You fucking idiot! What’s wrong with you? Your girlfriend is calling out to you, “Baby, I miss you, I need you sooo bad right now” and you’re staring at a computer screen? Rather than picking her up and throwing her into bed, you diddle around looking at porn!! If you really enjoy watching that farting one-eyed octopus more than her, have your girlfriend give me a call and everybody can go home happy.

Cordially yours,

The Master of the Extraordinary

PS Don’t anybody ever write me again!

– The Master of the Extraordinary

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1 Comment

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One response to “Ask the Master of the Extraordinary – Computer Nerd

  1. Pingback: In Defense of Pornography | Tales of Extraordinary Sanity

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